This morning I was planning how many donuts to buy for our first Chanukah celebration tonight. My daughter said “Uncle David eats lots of halves, so buy lots for him”.
I was remembering the many Saturday afternoon tea parties at my house.
A huge gaggle of female relatives, sitting around the table for hours.
Eating slivers of cake.
Many many slivers over the course of the afternoon.
I can’t have a whole piece, I’m dieting” (they were ALWAYS dieting).
“I’ll just have a taste” (my granny’s favourite)
My sister and I used to laugh that they ate way more than one piece with all their slivers! And they didn’t even enjoy the cake.
Because they were pretending that they weren’t eating.
Fog eating, my teacher, Brooke Castillo, calls it.
Eating behind your own back.
As if it won’t count if you don’t pay attention.
So it does double damage: weight gain and shame.
The best news: when I told my daughter that Uncle David takes only halves because he’s worried about his weight and doesn’t allow himself a whole donut, she disagreed and said “no, he only wants a half”.
Major internal HI-FIVE for me!!!!
My children don’t know about dieting, deprivation, shame, or lying about what you eat.
They know that you eat what you love to eat
You eat when you’re hungry
You stop eating when you’ve had enough
You never eat it if you don’t love it
They know that
their body is perfect
stunningly uniquely perfect.
Four children. Four different body types
Now THAT feels like freedom.